Free:

From the side of the Road in Tupper Lake last Sunday:

I'm not sure what I'll do with the little yellow dresser right now, but who can pass that up? Maybe it will house my fabric stash, and the pink and white mirror will go in Ray's room over her dresser. I LOVE these two things. Now I have to have a yard sale to justify bringing more furniture into the house. Out with the old, in with the...um...old, right? I sure miss my flash. it goes in the mail tomorrow which is scary.

All of these:

They're all blooming at once for the first time ever, and I've had most of them for several years:

There's another one I'll get to when it's all the way open. I think it's the one my mother-in-law gave me when Rayona was born. I also have the one that was hers -it bloomed right around her birthday. So sad. I miss her.

I have received my new 10.5" skillet in the mail today. I cleaned and re-seasoned it right away, and then baked a half-whole wheat-cherry-upside-down cake in it. Which is perfect. It has ground walnuts in it which make it super rich. That and the entire stick of butter that went in, but that's neither here nor there. I'd show you a picture, but my crappy on-board flash doesn't do it justice. The point is that this pan is the right size for regular cake baking. I love cooking things in a skillet. My Dad passed along to me a 7" one that belonged to his mother last night. It's just the right size to fry an egg, or maybe bake one of those tiny-dense-almond-flourless-type cakes. Maybe you know the ones -they're french, I think.

Well...it's something at least:

Some meager offerings from my plants, and a nice cake I made in my skillet (apple upside-down). I hate on-board flash. What a brat I am that this bothers me so much. I guess I like taking photos more than I thought.

My Speedlight quit.

Right in the middle of the job. The capacitor stopped charging, and the ready light would not come on, and no matter what freshly charged batteries I stuck in there it still said "batt". I looked it up, and there is a circuit that goes bad, and a new module needs to be put in. So this is pretty much exactly what I was so afraid of, and it happened. It was like a bad dream. I tried not to panic, but it was one of the single most stressful events in my recent memory. I had to finish the whole reception with my on-board flash, and the photos LOOK LIKE SHIT. I felt so bad about it I wanted to cry. At least I got the ceremony, and all of her wedding party photos. I will never do another wedding again without a backup flash. Not that I will ever be able to afford one. So it goes. I feel like a tool.

Anyway, now I have no speedlight for however long it takes Nikon to fix it and send it back. Where did I put that warranty card?

Anyone else know about this product?

It's one of my favorite things. I know you can't get it everywhere -I guess it's a nothern thing.

Toasted with butter and a cup of coffee. Yum!

I'm trying to enjoy these little things each day as I can. My schedule is absolutely killing me, and I've missed much of the summer. No action on our house still, and someone else is getting the beautiful little cottage we were so hoping for. My heart was broken for about a day, and then I managed to remind myself that anywhere is a good home as long as my loves are safe and sound. I need a break from the bills, though. Today I go to my first wedding as the hired photographer. I'm a little nervous, mostly because it's a once in a lifetime event, and if something goes wrong that would be tragic, and the bride will hate me forever. At least that's how I see it at about 4:00 in the morning when I'm wide awake, and at my most unreasonable. Whatever -I'm sure I'll do fine. Sort of.

Anyway, it's Saturday, and I don't have to be at work until three, and my husband is home too, and this never happens, so we're off to take a nice walk.

Mmmmmm...

Oh, also:

I got this at the flea market while we were on vacation. I've wanted one for the longest time, and this one is awesome. It's HUGE (12"), and very old. I cleaned, and re-seasoned it a bit, and now nothing sticks to it. I've used it for french toast, and a spinach & zucchini frittata. Both were perfect.


I was giddy over this purchase and no one seemed to understand it, except for maybe Josh a little. -But only because he knows how I am, not because he'd get all mooney-eyed from a skillet. It's a bit romantic perhaps, but I wonder about the other women who used this before me. I like old household tools. I like the worn, and handled, and well loved possesions of others. I feel like this is a right of passage almost. Plus, now I can stop burning my pancakes on stainless steel. Oh, I'm so looking forward to plates of eggs, and maybe falafel, and veggie burgers, and grilled cheese, and fried green tomatoes, and fried zucchini, and I bet it will bake coffee cakes too. Anyone get this at all?

The Cape:

Well, we went on a real vacation for the first time in several years. It was so nice -Cape Cod is very beautiful, and quite different from here.

We stayed in this lovely house:

My father-in-law (the painter) rented this place so that he could paint some artist friends of his whose studio is here as well. There are so many photos from this trip that I think Flickr is the best way to share them, so please take a look if you like.

It was a great trip, and we are so grateful for the opportunity to spend time together as a family. Unfortunately, until we can unload our house we are both forced to work so much that we don't see nearly enough of each other. I need this to change, and soon. My schedule is wearing me out, and when I'm at work there is little quality time with Ray. It turns out that neither of the potential buyers we were waiting on are in a position to make an offer. So we're still stuck. For me, money worries are a particular trouble. I have a tendency to let them ruin a lot of potential fun, and rob me of relaxation and sleep. I'm obviously not alone in this, but I am the sort of person who lets worry get totally out-of-hand. I have to make a huge effort to keep that in check. I just want a little bitty house that we can afford without me having to do a million cleaning jobs a week with baby in tow. I know how much wanting things and situations different than what you've got can mess you up, though. So I'm working on all this all the time in my head, and in my soul. I know I've done the right thing. I truly do believe that women have the right to raise their own children if possible, and I'm not putting anyone in daycare. I also don't want to lose everything I've worked for over the years or put us all in financial peril. I may have already done that, though. I sure do need something to happen pretty soon.